I'M IN SUCH A BAD MOOD

i'm not even angry like violent, which i usually get but like a depressed angry.
a kind that sort of just bubbles inside and no matter what happens i enjoy staying like that, i fucking thrive off it. i just wanna talk about it but i don't wanna bring it up. its like i hate him when he's off his game ball so does that mean that i don't know him at all? whatever, its been like four days and i'm not even attatched. ugh and i'm afraid about the just friends vibe. but still. we ARE perfect for each other and yet i'm just not feeling that kind of spark. but it's probably because i can't let go of the stupid fucking idiot "prince charming" my ass.

so back to why am i upset.
oh because i try to get his friends to like me and they don't.
because i don't know.
i don't feel like talking.
maybe i'm just more lagging than talking and idk i used to LOVE falling asleep angry.
best naps of my life.
back when i was with max.
but this is alex.
and things are supposed to be different, like wtf, i don't want to be mad i just can't figure it out.
i really just don't feel like talking even though i know i want to.
and seriously, fuck frankenstein.
i'll do it another time.
if alex goes to sleep instead of talking to me though i'm gunna be SO FUCKING PISSED.